Shoot Me. Kneel? I Think Not.

When you're all tattered and battered, you just stand still and do nothing. Don't get dispondent at this. Keeping still in a battle isn't necessarily a sign of defeat. It is in fact a fighter's way of standing his last defense, refusing to fall and surrender. Endlessly chanting in his heart that his back up team would just come in time to save his ass. If they don't, well, it'd certainly worth the momentary threat he causes to the opponents. They say, if you can't be strong, act like it. Who knows what might happen at the tick of the final second. Begging for your dear life, naw that's disgraceful.

Discarding, Mending, Regreting, Wondering Irritably..Yet Still Rewarded

My eyes were tired from straining to see things in the lack of lights at home. And when i got to the brighter part of the house which is the kitchen, they turned sore at the sight of the inside the fridge. I thought maybe reading would do me some good this evening. Upon reaching a basketful of half-read books, i pondered at the liquer basket and unhung frames on each side of the books..longer than i had to. Then the phone rang, i jumped, lost interest in reading, and cursed at the wet floor coz i almost slipped, and cursed again when i missed the incoming call. And cursed again when i saw who called. Flopped down on the couch, sinking deeper than it could take me, and made the heaviest sigh of the day. What now. Why now. Damn just get to your freaking home and don't drop by. And i stared at the spot where my light and fan used to be and got irritated at the store, just how long does it take to fix a stupid fan and light anyway? And what do i do with all the edible junks in the fridge? When do i get to hang those frames? Why on earth did i buy so much liquers? And when the hell did it start rainning? And i was imagining punching the store manager in the face. And got even more annoyed thinking bout my ruined holiday. And i kept on burping gas, well well even my system was going against me. Good, work with that gas over time tonight, you ain't getting anything for dinner. And phone rang again. Damn i hate the ring tone. Then i remembered why i liked to set the old phone on silent mode. I snapped at the caller with a crude what-is-it-and-it's-better-be-liferisking-important hello. 'i'm dropping off some stuff for you in awhile. Get dressed we're goin to dine somewhere near'. Mind was shouting: untimely dinner invitation and buying me stuff aren't gonna make it fine with me for you to ruin my freaking plan! But i killed off d conversation, if it was a conversation at all, with a nice-but-im-not-flatered oh, and and-im-still-angry k. So off i went to dine. With unpleasant unspoken words written all over me. I was poking at my food. I was everywhere but at the table. happy diners don't poke at their foods and responsive to what's being said. And it doesn't take a genius to understand these rebellious gestures. I almost had it when, well let's just say the the deal with the ruined holiday is off plus some extra bonuses from the honesty outpouring over dinner. Should've been mad, i was a little, but i was more proud. Got home and rummaged through the dropped-off stuff. Foods! Oh man when do people get to understand i can afford my own foods and i have plenty than i can manage to consume! Enough worrying in 1 day. The heck with everything. I abandoned troubled ship and went to rest my head n closed my burning eyes. And this line was rocking my soul in my self-composed musical notes: and lady *jenjeng jenjeng* you thought your mean and filthy ways could outsmart me *jenjeng jenjeng* they could, they had *jenjeng jenjeng* but you had never really defeated, aaand oh wow will ever defeat me with your *jenjeng jenjeng* mean ayayand filthy waaays! *and in softer tones* coz lady, you can never outsmart my mighty keeper. So laaady, stop pretending you don't know what's going on *back to rocking jenjeng* stop just stop *jenjeng jenjeng* making belief that you had it all right. Oh stop *b4 jenjeng* stop faking now ...oh oh. It's still playing even as im writing this...-hard day, blessed end-

SPOILED MYSELF SILLY

Had too much of the good stuff. We call it sanmiglait. Right pronunciation wrong spelling.

It was supposed to be a ‘rami’ call but heck the beers were yelling for attention. So, we had it to the last bottle. Surprisingly we made it out of the friend’s place by 2am. The last things I remembered before everything went dark and heavy were the time on my mobile clock displayed 230am and my head was running through the things I needed to do when I wake up.

Woke up at around 7am, I wandered around the house until I found my spot before the tv. Tried so hard to stay awake but the alcohol was still in-charge of the system, so I gave in. Back to bed, drifted back to deep sleep until 1pm. Woke up to the blaring sound of car engine next door. I got edgy knowing it was getting late and I had done nothing productive as I planned. I got so much to do, so little resolve. Felt like the most undisciplined human in the whole universe at that moment.

So the rest of the day spent on my notebook, just staring, didn’t quite know what to do with it. It was already 3pm when I finally decided to play my Bleach DVD. And half an hour later the anime characters were presented with a free-style sleeping beauty for about 2 whole hours. When I woke up it was already dark, and my head was throbbing, face felt like being stretched from all directions. And out of the blue I craved for the noodles my friend made last night which I had endlessly made fun of and called by all sort of names. When I said crave….I meant major crave, I was actually drooling at the thought of having another plate of it, right then right there. So that contributed to the building of will to move my ass to do something, at least about the stupid crave.

Blah blah blah I managed to bath, do at least half of the things I had to do, and get my basket filled at CKS with items that I imagined would make nice dinner. Despite the fact that I wasted my day ridiculously and felt overly spoiled, I made myself dinner, inspired by the funny testing noodles expertly invented by my dear friend Melbie...

TAAAADAAAAAAA!!

RESURFACED!!

RM0.50 + RM1.00 = cukup-cukup tambang balik kinarut
Translation: kalu teda duit jan turun kk

Love yourself before others
Translation: becinta lah sendri-sendri

Nobody's perfect
Translation: carilah kawan yang teda kaki seblah

Pictures speak louder than words
Translation: kalu pigi library carilah buku yang banyak gambar

To forgive is to forget
Translation: kalu begaduh buat-buat ilang akal

No mistake cannot be corrected
Translation: kalu buat correction sila lah guna pen merah

There's always a pleasure in the fall of a friend
Translation: kalu kawan jatuh trus pandang awan pura-pura tia kanal

2's a company, 3's a crowd
Translation: kalu pigi dating jan bawa kawan

Vugok kiva JE
Translation: spray your food before you eat it

Au nokontok target sabab au mintong ih aim
Translation: kalu tingu Anugerah Industri Music jan pakai spek itam

3 and 3 make 6, not 9
Translation: kalu tia pandai mengira sila lah guna calculator

'now he's gettiin a tattoo, he's gettin ink done. he asked for a 13 but they drew a 31...'
Translation: a 33 for a tatto is safer

school sucks, go to college

Too much heaven
Translation: telimpas surga

Love and women can be a lethal combination
Translation: becintalah sesama lelaki

...scribbled on a piece of paper in different handwritings, in a text book from college. Though i couldn't recall when and where did it take place in history, i knew we had a good time producing the piece. Amazing how an old piece of paper can spell the fun and excitement of living a crazy college life. Boy am i glad i didn't accept those uni offers!! And yeah i miss being impulsive, i miss being crazy, i miss being different, i miss you guys...

AN OFFICE OF WORKING BEASTS

The 12-Legged Spider

Official Appointment: Admin. Personnel
severely mutated into a 12-legged spider by constant inconsiderate demands of the collegues. life span is being prolonged by the disability to comprehend chinese and irresponsive to unreasonable behaviors.
The Insensitive Parrot:
Official Appointment: Account Clerk
talks at unbelievable high pitch especially when expressing herself. proclaims she's being underpaid for the jobs she's doing (i'd say that's ahelluvacraps). doesn't read annoyed gestures well. not even turning your head the other way would stop her talking. when she's quiet she's either busy wondering what's the husband doing at home or she's so engaged observing you like you have a tumor on your forehead or something. blessed with the immunity to psychological harassment.
The Big-assed Elephant:
Official Appointment: The Boss' Sister-in-law
she has big ears coz she really listens even when she's not supposed to, she has a big mouth coz she always talks even when it's cool to be quiet over something. she has big voice coz she speaks louder than the boss' wife. she has a big desk coz she keeps lots of rubbish. she has a big head coz she's a natural big-headed old bag, and probably the brain is swelling coz she concerns so much over minor and irrelevant things (i hope it'll just explode 1 day). she has big rear coz she's too lazy to even make a 5-step approach to the fax machine. one nice thing bout her though, she has a biiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiig and nice smile...to mask her fiend-liness.

WELL SPENT WEEKEND

PROVOKING PIG FROM THE MALL
'...neither a reference book nor a collection of answers to old puzzles; it is rather a provocation, a stimulus to futher thought...' says the author.
i'd say, it is provoking indeed. contents are as delicious as the cover, simply satisfies my crave of having to shake some rusts off my head.
it is a book that i can get so indulged with yet i don't quite understand what it's all about. simply delicious and french.
something good i brought home from my sunday outing, since the i-dont-remember-what thing i bought for my dad in May.



EXPENSIVE PATHETIC MORNING
early unauthorized wake-up call, quick unconvincing morning bath, ridiculous atm transaction (just how often do you get to carry around 100pcs of RM1 notes?), aren't how i look forward to start any sunday but that's just how my weekend greeted me and i ended up having these nicely folded in my purse...